ive got thing thing on my user info page. that chronicles everyones most recernt post's mood from accross all of livejournal.
so it establishes the overall mood of livejournal; presently, livejournal is content.
i dont feel that our louisville chapter is doing its part for ljs mood.
were all blind. (like the owls...tatum...)
so many people hurt. love and caring can only go so far when people get caught up in hurt.
hurt is tragic. but its also just so.
we need to be alot more bold about what we want. and we can do this unselfishly. its possible.
between everyone i know, theres definately enough strenght and empathy and care and power that we could could all be in love rather than in fear..where so many of us are.
self pity has little value.
and we have to stop seeking and seeking what we do in roundabout ways, and really get down to it.
everyones so roundabout. we pout. we beat around what we want, and then we surrender for second best, or worse. and noone willing to push their own desires strong enough..but in doing so we are all selfish.. we are selfish for hiding that which we are and for never reaching our potential. its not an end thats personally aceptable, but rather, a vice that drags us all down collectively.
maybe there isnt any particular stagnate, or anyparticular lack of growth, but certainly i see no firm and powerful progressive growth among those i know.
and why? why shouldnt we? we are so blessed that we could be such great leaders..
and in our great 'sacrifice of self' we deny our own blessing in favor of focusing on the flaws.
we all have such beautiful characters, such beautiful souls. such beautiful personalities that it makes me breakdown. and yet..we deny them.
we cant get over ourselves..over our own hurt.
what we think we deserve, but wont claim anyway.
and these relationships we tentatively engage in...where is the courage we should have?
we enter so unsure..
we're all missing the point.
and the fact that these realtionships are who we are. even if they end, its not a negative thing. thats so worthless.
whats the point of something good if when its over we let ourselves be consumed by anguish and self-doubt.
its not weakness pushing people apart,
its good memories, new outlooks, deeper personalities, and time that push people onward.